Children on... happiness, divorce, sex, playing, heroes and depression
The issues that affect their lives and the lives of their parents
Sunday, 23 July 2006
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Happiness: "I don't think money makes you happy." - LUCIA VICTOR, 10
Britain's "happiness" guru says the children of 2006 are caught in a trap. They are better off than ever before, but, asks Lord Layard, are they happier?
British kids are under increasing levels of stress and pressure from friends, teachers, parents and advertising. They have to endure pressure to pass exams, have the latest trainers and hairstyles, own the latest computer games and keep slim, tanned and "fit".
There is evidence that rates of mental ill-health for children are rising, but if you ask kids if they are happy, a vast majority will emphatically say "yes" and insist that adults don't understand them.
They are proud to have video game players, iPods and mobile telephones, and want more independence and to be taken more seriously. Most children know that their happiness depends on the simplest of recipes: good friends, good parents, a happy family and "having fun".
And, according to an NOP poll for the Children's Society, girls put an emphasis on good friends and a happy family, while boys are keener on play, sports and toys.
Bullying, bad parenting and violence are the things kids fear most not modern problems such as high-pressure advertising, tougher exams, peer pressure to own the newest Nike trainers or too much television.
In fact, research has indicated that children nowadays are much less likely to keep problems quiet or to worry about their looks even than children growing up in the 1990s. More than a quarter of all young teenagers say they are satisfied "a lot" with their lives more than double the figure 10 years ago.
27% of 12- and 13-year-olds are "satisfied a lot" with their lives
Divorce: "I have a great relationship with my mum, she is like my best friend, we do lots together, but I do get on well with my dad too. Although I only see him once a month." - JADE GOVAN, 13
Marital breakdown is shaping the lives of record numbers of British children. In 2002, 149,000 children under 16 were affected by divorce, nearly twice as many as in 1971. However, that was still lower than the highest annual figure, recorded 13 years ago, of 176,000.
Researchers also found that almost one in four children born in 1979 had experienced divorce by the age of 16. But despite its frequency, only one in 20 believe their parents' separation was properly explained to them.
Instead, grandparents and schoolfriends emerged as the greatest sources of comfort.
A quarter believed that no one had talked to them at all about the reasons for their parents' separation. On the plus side, more than half of the children who spent time in two different households took a positive view of such an arrangement.
25% of children born in 1979 had experienced divorce by the age of 16
Sex: "All my friends feel pressure to get a girlfriend, but once you have had one then you can rest on your laurels a bit." - TRISTAN BALCOMBE, 15
Children as young as 12 are coming under pressure from peers to lose their virginity, and are turning to alcohol to help them.
That's according to ChildLine - the charity says it has callers who speak of lives in which sex and alcohol are far more available than advice on how to deal with them.
But, beyond shock headlines, statistics give only a partial picture of the role of sex in the lives of British children. Britain does have the highest rate of teen pregnancy in Europe - around 40,000 under-18s are expected to fall pregnant next year. And, as ever, children are unsure about just what can be expected of them.
For example, while more than 50 per cent of under 16s believe most of their peers have had intercourse, polls suggest the true figure is close to 30 per cent, with girls more likely than boys to have had sex, by 31 per cent to 17.
50% of children under 16 believe most of their peers have had sex; polls suggest the true figure is nearer 30%
Playing: "I like to play on computer games when the weather isn't good. My friends and I play football and fighting games." - ASHLEY THOMPSON, 9
If playtime for British children in 2006 has an icon, it is the computer games console. While simple pleasures such as hopscotch or hide-and-seek seem to belong to a bygone age, today's children are more likely to get their kicks from PlayStations, Xboxes and other types of electronic gadgetry.
They are an unavoidable fact of life for young boys- up to 77 per cent have spent time playing computer games, although the figure drops to 32 per cent for girls.
The purchasing power of even very young children has been boosted. Those aged between seven and 19 have more than £3 to spend a week, while 11- to 14-year-olds have more than £7. Toys and games top the list of items children spend their money on, although the appeal of books continues to endure.
Children are also bolstering the ranks of cinema-goers with as many as 36 per cent of 7- to 14-year-olds going at least once a month.
77% of young boys have spent time playing computers
Heroes: "My hero is Frank Lampard. If I grow up to be a football player, I want to be just like him." - ALFIE BLAGG, 7
For today's children, celebrity and heroism appear virtually indistinguishable. Idolising footballers such as Wayne Rooney and David Beckham or pop stars such as Girls Aloud is the order of the day, rather than looking up to more traditional figures.
Indeed, under-10s believe that being famous is the best thing in the world, according to a new survey of British and European children, organised to coincide with the first National Kids Day.
Children spend a lot trying to imitate the appearance of their heroes. In 2005, 11-14s spent an average of £10.30 a week on clothes, £9 per week on computer games, £5.40 on music and £4.93 on hobbies.
A new children's magazine, CY, has launched a campaign to make kids aware of what it calls "real heroes" such as Bob Geldof, Kelly Holmes and Zac Goldsmith.
£10 The average amount spent by 11-14s each week on clothes
Depression: "Everyone knows that counselling is available, but people think if they go they must be mad. The Government should promote other options." - SAAD BATT, 18
Depression is not merely the preserve of the stressed-out adult. Mental problems for children are rising: 10 per cent of youngsters are so affected by suicidal thoughts, stress or the daily urge to cry that they need professional help. The average age for depression to strike is now 14 - down from 30 in the 1980s. Serious depression among children may be falling. Suicide rates among children and young people fell by nearly a third between 1992 and 2002 - although rates for girls under 14 rose by 4 per cent, up to 14 girls per 100,000. There are 27,000 children on Prozac and 345,000 on the behaviour drug Ritalin.
And 15 per cent of pre-school children will have mild mental health problems, with a further 7 per cent experiencing severe problems. Suicide now accounts for one in five deaths among children and young people.
15% of pre-school children will have mild mental health problems
